Sakura's Crazy Cat, Nolee
by Kagome-Loves-Kouga
Summary: Sakura's Cat has a wit, and temper to match her owner's. see what Nolee, the cat, does when Naruto and Sasuke come over for dinner with our favorite little Cherry Blossom. T for slight cursing. will make more chappies later, if reviews want them... XD
1. The Dinner:Nolee can do WHAT?

**_okay, Sakura has a cat. a cat that is WAY overprotective of Sakura. a cat that has a good sense of humor. here ya go!_**

**DEDICATED TO:**

**laughannie711**

**for giving me this idea! TNXS! **

**XD Nolee is my own creation though...**

**a slightly evil, but cute kind...BWAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**Nolee-ME-E-EOW!!**

**K.L.K-...yeah, Nolee is the cat. don't kill anyone, okay?**

**Nolee- ME-(pauses for a second)-OW! -slight smirk-**

**K.L.K- no...is she smirking...?**

**Nolee- Meow? -(tries to look innocent)-**

**K.L.K- hmm...-(keeping one eye on the cat, one eye on the computer)-**

**Sakura- all she owns is the cat! she doesn't own Naruto... all she has is a sweet pair of black kakhi pants and a bunch of black clothes...**

**K.L.K- ;D**

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Sakura looked at her feline companion as she pet the brown, velvety soft head, and the cat looked back with bright green eyes, and meowed.

"oh, yeah. Naruto and Sasuke were coming over for dinner..." the pinkette remembered. she got up, and walked to the small kitchen and started to make a simple beef casserole, rice balls, and some tea.  
an hour later, someone knocked on the door repededly.

"COME IN!!" Sakura shouted. she had the door unlocked, but oh well. she was just finishing up putting the tea into her refridgorator, when she heard the door open, a yowl from her cat, and Naruto yelling.

she hurried out to the living room, with the couch and tv, and stared at her purring cat, and Naruto up on a chair, his clothes mostly shredded.

"I had no Idea there were such things as guard CATS!" Naruto huffed. his skin was scratched everywhere, from her cat.

"Nolee! what did I tell you about attacking people?!" the cat meowed. "okay, only people who aren't friends, still! you can't attack Naruto!!" another Meow. "I don't CARE if you mistook him for an angry Ino!! don't do that again!!" Sakura scolded her cat once more. the cat, Nolee, looked at Naruto, and almost looked apologetic. it meowed.

"it's okay...when'd you get a cat, Sakura?" the orange-loving nin asked.

"actually, someone left her outside my doorstep, and she just sat there... but then Ino came by to yell at me for something or the other, the cat went totally spastic, sent Ino running. I decided to keep her right then and there."she smirked.

the cat licked it's paw, as if saying, _**'oh. too kind. she was just annoying me, that's all!'**_

they went into the kitchen, and were chatting when a knock sounded at the door. "COME IN!!" they yelled. they heard the door open, followed by another yowl.

"AHH! IT'S TRYING TO GOUGE OUT MY EYES!!"they heard Sasuke yell as they ran into the living room. they were met by Sasuke trying to throw off the cat, who looked like it was having the time of it's life, trying to gouge out the young Uchiha's eyes with her sharp-as-kunai claws.

"ME-EOW!!" the brown cat exclaimed as she daintily hopped off, leaving a badly scratched up, and fuming, Sasuke in her path.

"was that your pet, or a guard cat, Sakura?" he asked, feeling his face.

"I don't know. kinda both. she goes spastic on Ino when she comes over here, so the cat's staying." she turned toward the cat, currently on the couch. "Nolee! what did I tell you about attacking people who aren't enemy ninja OR Ino!?" the cat seemed to give a shrug.

"I'll cut off your supply of tuna if you don't quit it." at this, the cat jumped up, ran over to Sakura, and started rubbing on her legs. "stop trying to butter me up. it isn't going to work." the cat flashed it's geen, sparkly, 'PLEASE forgive me!' eyes at the pink-haired kunoichi, who shook her head. "nope!" at this the cat ran off to the bedroom.

"..." Sasuke looked at the pinkette. "were you just...holding a conversation with your cat?" he asked.

"yes, duh! it's the hidden bloodllimit of the Haruno line. it only comes out in certain Kunoichi. it allows us to communicate with cats, dogs, a few others." Sasuke looked at her like she was nutso. "well? if YOU were going to be eaten by something, wouldn't you want to be able to tell it you aren't a food source?!"

he thought about it, then nodded.

then they all went into the kitchen, and ate dinner.

"Sakura, I know what we should call your cat, as a nickname." Sakura looked bored. " how about vicious?" at that, and kunai flew out of Sakura's bedroom's direction, missing the Uzumaki only because he dodged.

Sakura looked at the cat, who was purring. "you've been watching me train too much, Nolee. still, good shot." she murmured to the cat.

Sasuke looked on with wide eyes, then just thought one single thought, other than: 'DAMN! the cat can throw KUNAI!?'

it was this:

'Sakura's cat sure is crazy...' the cat glared at him, as if marking him with her eyes, practically saying that he was next on the list. he shuddered, and tried to keep his thoughts off the strange cat. 'all I know is if Sakura trains her, and she becomes a nin Cat, I DO NOT want to be against her!'

there is only one thing 100 percent logically irrufudable in this story. it is that Nolee, Sakura's cat, had a temper and a wit to match her owner's.

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**K.L.K- HAHAHALOLZ! haha! XD NOW THAT WAS FUNNY!**

**please review if you want me to continue this, with the amazing Nolee!**

**Nolee- Meow! -(looks proud)-**

**K.L.K- also, don't piss her off...she can throw kunai...**

**Nolee- grrr...-(holds kunai in teeth menacingly)-**

**K.L.K- erm...-(ducks under bed, mutters)- great. I'm afraid of a fictional cat I made up.**

**-(kunai imbeds itself in the bed, half an inch from K.L.K's face.)-**

**K.L.K- and I have good reason to.**

**Nolee- Meow! -smirks-**

**K.L.K- O.O wow...I didn't know cats could smirk...**

**PLEASE review! or Nolee has a few more kunai... and she nearly hit Naruto. yep, don't flame, 'cause I WILL send her in all her glory!**

**Nolee- MEOW!**

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	2. Nolee ATTACKS KAKASHI! dun dun dun!

**K.L.K- YO! I really like writing about Nolee, so here ya go. chapter two of this crazy feline's destruction on the human phyche. XD**

**Nolee- Meow!**

**K.L.K- ...**

**Ino- yo! K.L.K, can you try a InoShika soon?**

**K.L.K- Iie. I like SakuShika better. maybe after school starts... or I type it. I dunno when...**

**Ino- oh.**

**K.L.K- how about I totally let you get Sasuke-teme in someone's fic that is a 'Ask the Akatsuki' fic?**

**Ino- YAY!!**

**K.L.K- good, 'cause it's already done. thnxs Katherineyuki cute! this chappie's dedicated to: who else!? Katherineyuki cute, for her excellent fic, titled: Ask the Akatsuki . check it out, it's CRACKTASTIC! 8D check it out. I sent in a LONG review, with a bunch of random dares...KEWL!**

**Ino- X.x**

**K.L.K- Ino?**

**Ino-X.x**

**K.L.K- (sigh) she fainted...(pokes with stick) YAYEE! THE STICK POKING IS BACK!! (pokes Ino happily) FEAR DAH MIGHTY STICK!**

**Nolee- Meow... -.-'**

**K.L.K- I'm bored...(whacks Ino in the face.) wow...I didn't know cats could sweatdrop...**

**Nolee- (glares at Ino) MEROWWW!! (attacks Ino)**

**Ino- OWWW! (gets clawed) YE-OUCH! (cat bites her hand) OWWIE!! (Nolee bites Ino's Nose) OWWW!! OW! THAT HURTS!!**

**K.L.K-... I'm not getting into that! you think I'm crazy for this, right? not helping her? well, would YOU want to even get near that!? (points to Ino getting her ass handed back to her by Nolee)**

**Ino- (weakly lifts up finger) K.L.K does not own anything but Nolee, and a Konoha Hitiate she is currently wearing as she types...(faints)**

**Nolee- merrow! MEOW! (grins)**

**K.L.K- O.O**

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Nolee looked up at her owner, Sakura Haruno. the Kunoichi had smashed her alarm clock, still in her sleep,and had settled back down. the cat watched a wall clock tick by, as if she could read the time. a brown ear twitched as she felt her owner's sensei's presence come closer, enter the apartment, and...

the cat smirked evilly, then hid out on the couch. the silver haired jonin looked at the cat, that looked as if it WAS smirking at him... the cat jumped off the couch, and headed toward Sakura's Sensei, sat with her haunches seemingly relaxed. she looked into the Jonin's eyes, then as he reached down to pet her, she jumped, not leaving any time at all for him to react.

"ARG!! SAKURA! YOUR CAT!" he yelled, waking the pinkette, who peeked her head out of the bedroom, and still in her flannel PJ's, walked out, and picked up the cat.

Kakashi looked at the cat, and decided it was probably laughing at him. Sakura looked at her sensei, and held in a bout if maniacle laughter. the cat had actually managed to cover him in scratches from head to foot, leaving the red bleeding marks everywhere.

"sorry, Kakashi-sensei. my cat, Nolee..."

"that's the pycho cat Naruto and Sasuke were talking about?" he asked, petting said cat's head gingerly, earning a slight purr from the feline. "they said it could throw kunai pretty well...can it?"

she nodded. "yep. she couldn't get to any, this early. trust me, if Naruto wouldn't have moved a fraction more then he did, we'd have an injured Uzumaki on our hands..."

"I came by to see why you weren't at training..." he simply replied.

"ah. I smashed my alarm clock as a reflex." she said, as if it were nothing.

"I really didn't know there was a such thing as a guard CAT. is she a pet, or...?"he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"kinda both. however, she mauls Ino whenever she comes, so I'm keeping her." she replied shrugging.

Nolee looked smug. a look that clearly said, **_'HELL YEAH!'_**

five minutes later, and refilling the food bowl, Sakura went on her way to training, as her 'normal' cat Nolee practiced throwing kunai, and pondered how to do Jutsus. she ate some food, and then settled down for a couple hours of plotting. she liked to attack people, because it gave her kicks.

by the time Sakura was home, she had konked out on her owner's bed. said owner shedded her day-clothes, then put on her night-clothes, and slipping into bed.

the brown-furred companion cracked open her green eye, but closed it, and dreamt of new ways to amuse herself.

there is one thing to be gathered from this: Nolee has a great sense of humor.

And: Kakashi is a Jonin...how'd she defeat a JONIN!?...oh, right, she distracted him with petting her...

**_'I can't WAIT for my next victi- I mean, friend-' the cat chuckled to herself in her sleep._**

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**K.L.K-(shudder)**

**Nolee- O.O**

**K.L.K- please stare at Ino!!**

**Nolee- O.O**

**K.L.K- grrr...dammit. anyway, here's the second chappie. if you want some Ideas in the next chappie, REVIEW!!**

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